Flourishing through the Margins: Spiritual Growth When Life Isn’t Going Well
Dr. Tyler VanderWeele, program director of the Harvard Human Flourishing program, argues that “Flourishing itself might be understood as a state in which all aspects of a person’s life are good” (emphasis mine). More specifically, Dr. VanderWeele suggests that people who flourish primarily do so because they prosper in five categories of human life:
happiness and life satisfaction
health, both mental and physical
meaning and purpose
character and virtue
close social relationships
Dr. VanderWeele’s framework for flourishing presents a vision of a realized perfection where a person’s inner and outer lives are in a state of complete balance and well-being. And while this picture of flourishing is ideal and taught to be attainable, it still feels far away to me.
I would be lying if I said I was 100% satisfied with the way my life was going. I’m a broke, anxious grad student in a post-pandemic world who is struggling to stay hydrated and keep my friendships alive. I’m a Black American millennial woman who’s fearful for my country’s security and future. I’m a concerned daughter who is watching her parents’ health deteriorate as my own mental health declines. Not all aspects of my life are good. Not by a long shot. I’m tired, lonely, and sometimes, deeply sad; yet, somehow, I still feel like I’m flourishing because I’m exactly where God wants me to be.
Is that weird?
Flourishing through the Unknown
For the last five years, God has taken me on a roller coaster of grief and fresh starts. I left everything I knew in New York City during the pandemic to help my aging parents retire and buy a house in Georgia. Now, I’m starting a new life in Atlanta, exploring my faith, and trying to flourish under the pressure of it all—which is a tall order in this economy and sociopolitical climate. Still, despite not experiencing overwhelming feelings of happiness, a specific sense of purpose, or immediate health benefits from life in the South, I have received peace beyond understanding to discern that I’m on my right path according to God’s plan, and that though it may not feel like all aspects of my life are good right now, that God is working all things out for my good anyway (Romans 8:28).
So, I guess you could say that I’m flourishing by faith, which is the story for so many marginalized Christians around the world. Rather than a realized, perfect vision of complete balance and well-being, my vision of flourishing looks like survival and maintaining the hope of God through adversity.
Dr. Patrick B. Reyes discusses this ideology in his book, Nobody Cries When We Die. Reyes surmises that for people of color, our “first vocational call is often a call to live, to survive” our present realities with authenticity, wisdom, and a connection to community. With this understanding, Reyes suggests that if the marginalized want to flourish in this world, we must ground ourselves in good soil, paying special attention to who we are, “the footprints we leave behind, and the footprints that walk alongside our own.” This means that to flourish is to press on through life’s struggles with humility and integrity, minding the posture of our ancestors and our Lord and Savior, who suffered unto death for the sins of humanity. Life isn’t always going to be good, but we can all still flourish if we hold onto our faith and live according to the teachings of Jesus Christ.
Flourishing through the Struggle
In a recent research study conducted by the De Pree Center, Executive Director Dr. Michaela O’Donnell and Dr. Meryl Herr found that more than feelings of satisfaction, flourishing leaders are “first and foremost vivid followers of Jesus” who are guided by a sense of hope, seek the best for others, and lean into challenges, crises, and crucibles. To me, this finding paints a more accurate picture of what it means to flourish as a Christian in this messed-up world.
When we’re anxious, overwhelmed, and struggling, the Bible reminds us that blessed are those who trust in the Lord. Verses like Jeremiah 17:7-8 remind us that to flourish means we must root our faith in God. That way, when life tries to dry us out, we won’t be fearful. Instead, amid seasons of trouble, we’ll continue to bear fruit. When the world is in crisis or life doesn’t seem to be going well, God is still with us, and promises flourishing to those who believe. Therefore, the key to flourishing is in strengthening our faith.
In her book, Church Girl, Dr. Sarita Lyons presents a gospel vision of flourishing for Black Christian women and all others who can relate to the struggle of trying to trust in God who, at times, feels distant, especially during challenging seasons. Lyons argues that to flourish, we must become students of God’s Word so that we can adopt a biblical perspective towards life, cultivate a proper understanding of God’s love, and develop genuine wisdom to move through life confidently. Lyons states that “our survival and thriving have always depended on our ability to hold on to the truths that God made us, died for us, redeemed us, and endowed us with power and purpose.” Therefore, our flourishing depends on our willingness to engage in a relationship with God and cultivate authentic discipleship in our daily lives.
Flourishing through Daily Practices
In addition to working and attending seminary, I still need to be more intentional about spending personal time with the Lord without an agenda or deadline. When I’m studying the Bible for a homework assignment or praying out of habit, I tend to miss out on the true value of sitting in God’s presence and hearing God’s voice. By consistently finding time to read my Bible (using apps like YouVersion and Hallow) and praying with diligence, honesty, and vulnerability, I can foster a deeper engagement with God that can lead to increased faith and flourishing.
When we find ourselves in a challenging situation, it’s helpful to have encouraging Scriptures to call to mind that urge us not to fear and to approach life with grace. The Bible serves as an instruction manual for those to flourish when they don’t feel like life is necessarily going well. Through the fall of creation, slavery, war, famine, and natural disaster, God teaches us through the Word that the way to flourish is to remain in God and that God will remain in us (John 15:4). When we read the Bible, we uncover the truth of God’s love that liberates us to flourish through any circumstance. When we search the Scriptures, we find the answers for how to flourish, whether or not we’re well. We learn to look for hope in the kingdom of God rather than placing our hopes in this world. And in doing so, we flourish. God adds to our bounty in every way (Matthew 6:33).
Plus, prayer allows us to unburden ourselves. Whether we’re lamenting life’s daily tragedies or thanking God for good news, prayer is a gift to humanity made possible through Jesus Christ. Thanks to Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, the veil of the temple was torn from top to bottom, which means we have direct access to God. We no longer need to confess our sins to priests or make animal sacrifices to atone for our debts, but we have an open invitation to speak plainly to God. How cool is it to have a God who welcomes communication with us? God wants to be the one we run to with our complaints, confusion, and questions. God wants to provide us with comfort and clarity when we need it most. When we pray, we develop faith in a God who hears us and answers, and a God who sits with us while we wait. When trouble comes along, prayer helps us flourish by helping us cut through life’s distractions to find gratitude and guidance. Prayer offers us the chance to reflect and do the inner work necessary to grow.
Still, we can’t do any of this work alone. When life isn’t going well, we could all benefit from having additional support and encouragement. Being engaged in reliable Christian communities means having people to talk to who will always point you back to Jesus. A community committed to your flourishing may not always say what you want to hear, but they hold you accountable to your faith and spiritual formation.
Flourishing through Faith
Together, these spiritual practices allow us to flourish through faith during life’s many challenges. Embracing God’s Word, prayer, and the gift of community transforms our lives by strengthening us to endure hardship graciously. When we’re firmly rooted in our identities as believers beloved by God and stay connected to God through these practices, there will be no challenge we can not overcome.
Despite popular definitions of flourishing that depict a perfect life of happiness and well-being, the journey toward flourishing, especially for the marginalized, is often filled with trials and uncertainties. Still, it is within these very struggles that our faith can grow stronger. While the traditional notion of flourishing may seem like a distant ideal, we find that true flourishing emerges from resilience, faith, and a deep connection to community and God.
As we navigate the complexities of life, be it personal struggles, the care of loved ones, or societal injustices, we can hold onto the hope that comes from our faith. By leaning on the teachings of Scripture and the wisdom passed down from our ancestors, we can find peace even in the chaos and trust that God is at work in our lives. Flourishing, in this context, is about embracing that process and recognizing that faith practiced both personally and communally is essential for our survival.
Therefore, as we journey forward, may we commit to nurturing the kind of faith that transcends circumstances. May we be rooted in the unwavering belief that our lives are meaningful and guided by a higher purpose. We’re exactly where we’re supposed to be, which means there are opportunities wherever we are to accept God’s plan for flourishing in our lives by carving out moments of joy, encouraging one another in the faith, and building an intimate relationship with God where we trust that even if everything isn’t exactly good right now, that God is working all things out for our good anyway (Romans 8:28).
